Shelter: Violence Hidden in the Dysfunctional Immigrant Family

Cindy Yang

FYS

Iyko Day

10/14/2016

Shelter: Violence Hidden in the Dysfunctional Immigrant Family

For immigrants family, the conflict between the primary culture background and new social context accounts for a lot of domestic violence problems. Jung Yun’s novel Shelter explicitly displays this fraught issue that is ongoing in the United States. In the novel, Jin and Mae, the first-generation immigrants successfully achieved respectable social status in the new environment of New England. Meanwhile, their son Kyung has been struggling to accomplish the American Dream apart from his parents by building a family on his own. Under the surface, invisible domestic violence exists in this family in different forms. The dysfunction of the two families in Shelter, sheds light on how contradictions between the Korean cultural context and the American Dream place pressure on the transnational family that can only be released through violence.

The image of masculine dominance in Korean family is unyieldingly strong and unquestionable. Taking the roles of being both husband and father, man has the most authority while the wife and children are expected to obey that dominance. Maintaining family harmony through the traditional family structure is the foundation of many immigrant families. As Kyung recalled “She never believed she was capable of anything. Jin made sure of that early on.”(125) Man’s control to the family members comes in a way of denying their ability. Even being raised in western environment, Kyung has internalized his role of being filial and obedient, which is deeply rooted in the Korean cultural context. Kyung sees himself as "not a good son; he knows this already. But he's the best possible version of the son they raised him to be. Present, but not adoring. Helpful, but not generous. Obligated and nothing more."(49) Being aware of the fact that he is unable to escape from the Korean cultural context, Jin restated this point by saying that: “Children are supposed to honor their parents.”(230) The tradition in from their own country is something that cannot be erased in their social values. At the same time, for reasons of social status and vanity, Jin places similar expectation on his wife to be flawless, to the point of being “too hard” on her. (321) The inner drive of being accepted by American society forces Jin to work hard as well as treat his family harshly. Since family is often the one stabilizing force that enables immigrants to weather the turbulent process of migration, the Cho family must balance all the pressure.

Meanwhile, the successful social status of the Cho family has been scrutinized by the Korean Christian community and the American working environment. The pressure from these two completely different sources finally leads to the collapse of their family. The invisible scrutiny from the Korean community gives Jin self-consciousness to keep his respectful status all the time. Jin recalls the social status he used to have in Korea, where “everyone openly admired Jin. Their neighbors and relatives called him ‘professor’ long before he even finished his degree.”(318) Coming to a strange country and attempting to regain everything he used to have is exceptionally difficult for an immigrant who comes from prestige. At the same time, the pressure from his current career reminds him of what he came here for. “I’d finally gotten tenure after six-years of people whispering about whether I was good enough, whether my research even mattered.”(318) Burdened with double pressure from two communities, Jin’s success is beyond anyone’s imagination. However, what motivates this immigrant family also ruins them. The collapse begins with the disobedience of Mae towards her husband and ends with her suicide. In trying to both maintain the respect of the Korean American ethnic community and achieve newly cultivated American ideals, Jin struggles to negotiate the clashing dynamics of the immigrant experience.

Everyone in this family realizes that they have to sacrifice something in order to accomplish what they crave the most - the American Dream. Mae and Kyung make great attempts to maintain the seeming perfection when they suffer violence from different sources. On the one hand, Mae’s exertion to show her resilience to the violence happens earlier in the novel when they have just immigrated to a new country. Within the family, Mae showed consistent obedience to her husband: “Every time Jin beats her in the corner because of a lukewarm dinner or an innocent comment, Kyung wondered why she wasn’t brave enough to run away.”(105) While showing up in front of strangers, Kyung remembers his mother going to his school with Jin: “my dad’s asking all these questions about my grades, while my mom’s sitting perfectly straight, her hair and makeup just right even though her back was covered with gashes.”(150) Bearing with the great pain from her husband, Mae shows up flawlessly to the outside world. Mae strives to hide her pain as if it is part of herself. On the other hand, Kyung himself endures the succession of violence in the family from his mother at the same time for the reason: “Kyung was learning faster than she was. Jin berated her for this, shouting when she couldn’t remember the words for things like ‘breakfast’ or ‘laundry’ and telling her he regretted marrying someone so dumb ”(124) During the early stage of their migration, Mae has a hard time adapting to everything that needs to be learned quickly. However, Kyung shows a special talent in assimilating into the new society, which forms a huge contrast to Mae. Violence comes as an outlet of Mae’s dissatisfaction about herself. Like how Mae reacts to Jin’s abuse, Kyung chooses to bear with the violence until his adulthood. The harmony in the family is disintegrating. Even with Mae and Kyung’s tolerance, they reach a breaking point. When all the pressure accumulates to a maximum, violence starts.  

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