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It's definitely not a secret that men and women have differences in how they approach self-disclosure. Men tend to be more guarded. I don't think that this is a defense mechanism or anything. Men just are not generally as talkative as women are. I can remember scenes from a few movies where the friend of a guy trying to impress a woman on a first date gives advice. In so many words the friend will encourage the guy to ask his date lots of questions, mainly about her. Its usually suggested that women love to talk about themselves or here someone else talk about them.

I know that personally I've experienced the typical outcome on dates where I will talk more than the guy and in one case the guy talking much more than I did. On page 67 the book states that there is an exception to what is considered normal in male female interaction. In the initial interaction between men and women, men man disclose more "in order to control the relationships development" . This makes a lot of sense. I can think of times when a guy has told me more than I wanted to know early on in a relationship. Thinking back, the more he told me, the more I told him. Therefore, he did control the speed that I became comfortable with him because I felt as though I knew him based on the depth of the information he gave me. I can also think of examples at work. I work with all females and one male. As females we tend to tell each other things that are more personal. One reason is because we are the same gender and therefore can identify on more levels than we could with males. However, if the same work situation was the complete opposite I doubt the same occurrence would happen. I believe that men will talk more about hobbies and things that they have accomplished more than they will talk about having a headache for instance.

I also believe that in most cases of initial interaction between two women is much more guarded than between two men. Women tend to size



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