Motif Essay - Depression Walking Alongside Me

Denisa Istrate

Mr. Richards

Hon. Soph. English

November 14, 2016

Depression walking alongside me

“Every man has his secret sorrows which the world knows not; and often times we call a man cold when he is only sad” were the words of Henry Wadsworth Longfellow. Holden Caulfield, like many others in their teenage years, struggles with the one of the most common psychiatric conditions, depression and the loneliness that comes along with it. J.D Salinger in his book, The Catcher in the Rye develops the motif of loneliness and depression to emphasize the thoughts and struggles of the modern day teenager. In doing so, he reveals that often teenagers distance themselves and over analyze things because they feel lonesome and are not yet capable to deal with what life throws at them.

As the book begins, the protagonist’s depressive and lonely state is evident. Holden, like most people his age feels overwhelmed by everything bad that happens to him and in trying to escape that, he withdraws himself from society.  For instance, at the beginning of the book while everyone is at the football game, Holden is "…standing way the hell up on Thomsen hill…" (2) He was distancing himself from his peers so he wouldn't feel as remorseful about when he would have to leave Pencey since he got expelled from yet another school. Holden chooses to be the only one who is not at the game because it was as he described it as being too depressing and full of phonies. Furthermore, whenever he put his hunting hat on he "…didn't give a damn how [he] looked. Nobody [would be] around anyway." (53) The red hunting hat is his way of making himself unapproachable. He puts on the hat because he was just leaving Pencey after a quarrel with his roommate and didn't wish to be bothered. Right after leaving he went to a hotel however he "was to depressed to care if [he] had a good view or not." (61) His depression takes over and he can no longer bring himself to care and it leads him to a great fall into loneliness.

Towards the middle of the book there is a war within Holden between embracing his depression and escaping his loneliness. When he is describing New York, he talks about how he doesn't understand when "somebody really wants to go"(116) to the movies. Holden has become so comfortable with his depression that he doesn't know what it's like to enjoy things. He often chooses to see only the half empty glass. Holden constantly talks about how he "[feels] like giving somebody a buzz." (59) However he can never think of anyone to call and if he does he always has reasons why he shouldn't. He knows that he needs someone around so he won't be so lonely but he always fells as though no one is able to be there for him. One night he decides to have a drink with an old friend but when he asks him to " have just one more drink. [Because he's] lonesome as hell"(149) he gets rejected. Since his loved ones can't be there for him he tries to find other to fill in that void.

...